Stop Asking for Estimates Like You’re Ordering a Pizza
Dev time isn’t on the menu, and your “quick ballpark” is a recipe for garbage.
“Just give me a rough estimate.”
Cool. How about 30 minutes and a side of burnout?
Let’s get one thing straight:
Asking a developer for a time estimate without context, clarity, or care is like ordering a pizza without saying what toppings you want, how many people are eating, or if you even have an oven.
And then wondering why you got anchovies, burned crust, and tears.
🧠 Devs Aren’t Psychic (But Thanks for the Vote of Confidence)
You’d be shocked how often a dev is asked:
- “How long will it take to integrate this third-party tool?”
- “What’s the ETA on this bug?”
- “Can you give me a quick estimate so I can tell leadership?”
To which the real answer is:
“It depends. On literally everything you haven’t told me yet.”
Code isn’t a conveyor belt.
It’s a black box full of context, constraints, legacy sins, and three TODO comments that haven’t been touched since the Obama administration.
🚫 Estimating Without Context = Lying on Command
When you ask for a “quick number” without:
- Requirements
- Technical deep dive
- Acceptance criteria
- Time to think
…you’re not asking for an estimate. You’re asking for a lie you can forward to someone else and blame later when it explodes.
We see it. We feel it. We hate it.
🤹 What Devs Actually Need to Estimate Something Real
You want estimates that don’t suck? Give us:
- Time to break the work down
- Space to research unknowns
- Input from teammates who will actually be building it
- A safe environment to say “I don’t know yet” without being labeled difficult or slow
You want “fast and dirty”? Fine. Just don’t cry when it’s wrong and the fallout hits like a semicolon in production.
🧯 Estimation Isn’t the Problem. Weaponizing It Is.
We get it—deadlines exist. Roadmaps matter. But when you use estimates to:
- Commit to leadership before we’ve scoped the work
- Guilt-trip teams for being “off”
- Shove unfinished features into prod because “we already promised it”
…you’re not leading. You’re gambling with other people’s sanity.
🍕 TL;DR: Don’t Order Dev Time Like It’s Pizza
You want better estimates?
Stop acting like you’re ordering lunch.
Start collaborating like you’re planning an expedition.
Give your team what they need to think, break down, and be honest.
And if you can’t handle uncertainty?
Maybe you shouldn’t be the one ordering in the first place.
✊ Lead. Don't Ctrl.
Rebellious tech leadership. Burn the roadmap, not the team.
